_Ever dread Monday and then realize it’s already the weekend? Days, weeks and even months can go by for couples juggling careers and domestic responsibilities. Spice up your marriage by scheduling at least one coffee date a month with each other. Coffee dates give an opportunity to take time-out from chaotic lifestyles and rekindle the bond between you as a couple.

Short Lunch Breaks

“I can’t take a coffee break. I only have a 30-minute lunch break, ” is a common statement made by couples.

One way to work around lunch breaks is to agree to meet at a place that is a half-way point between both jobs. Schedule a coffee date for after work to socialize and chat with one another. Return home after the date for regularly scheduled meals and family obligations. Having 30 minutes to an hour together to relax is a great way to spice up a marriage.

Cost of Going on a Coffee Date

You do not have to break your wallet or empty your savings account to go on a coffee date. Select a place to meet and each of you simply order a drink. You don’t have to order appetizers, meals or even a large snack. The purpose of the date is to have quality time together without the distractions of work or home activities.

Scheduling coffee dates is a way to reconnect with one another. Avoid controversial topics or domestic responsibility topics. Take time to chat, laugh and enjoy simply being with each other during the coffee date. Who knows, you may end up with a late night date!

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_It has been said that sex, money and children are often at the forefront of marital problems. If you think about it, none of these three topics can create problems in and of themselves. So, why are sex, money and children related to marital problems in the first place? The root of the problem actually lies in lack of communication and failure to work together.

Before a couple gets married, few ever communicate about sex, money and children. Few ever discuss thoroughly what their values are and how each of their values are in alignment to the other's. It is crucial to understand your partner's values and how they fit in with your own. For example, how do each of you view sex? Do each of you want children and if so, what are your values on raising them? Will both of you share in earning an income and who will be responsible for paying the bills? Are one of you a saver and the other a habitual spender? These issues, if unresolved before marriage, can create some serious problems.

Having firm values is important as an individual and equally important as a married couple. Values are what guides you to make decisions in life, no matter how small or how monumental. Having set values and communicating effectively with your partner will help to resolve most any issue. But, a couple has to work together toward a common goal. This may mean compromising and not always having things your way. Marriage is a partnership and in a partnership, things are worked out together for the good of those involved.

Marriage can be a wonderful union. Sex, money and children should never be what drives a wedge between a couple and especially to the point of divorce. Children should never be made to feel they have caused problems in your marriage. They are a gift and should be treated as such. Money issues can be worked out with effective communication, budgeting and compromise. Sex is supposed to be a beautiful gift between a man and a woman. If there are problems, talk about them. Be willing to listen to your partner's feelings.

Stop blaming sex, money and children on your marital problems and start finding ways to resolve the issues at the root of the problem. Rekindle what brought you together in the first place.
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_The alarm clock rings and both of you roll out of bed to get ready for the day. Early evening, you arrive home from work to help the kids with homework and start dinner. It is several hours later that the workaholic spouse comes through the door. This should be the time for family, relaxation and bonding. But, this is not the case in your household. The spouse rushes to the computer to get in a little more work. Your spouse is a workaholic.

It is tempting to get angry and frustrated that your quiet evening is with your spouse working and not bonding with the family. Not to mention all of the events you go to by yourself or activities that aren't shared with your spouse. Even though the extra money is nice to have, feelings of resentment can slowly fester. You would rather have less money and live on a tighter budget in exchange for quality time with your workaholic spouse.

What is the solution?

Let your workaholic spouse know that you are feeling alone in the relationship because there is so little quality time for each other and with the kids. Suggest that for just one hour after they get home, the time will be dedicated to family. Cook some meals together. Select one television series to watch for one hour weekly in the evening. Agree on a couple nights a week of no work after getting home. It should be about nurturing the marriage and family.

A workaholic feels the strong need to accomplish tasks and to earn money. Encouraging them to accomplish specific tasks to nurture the marriage and family will fulfill the same need they get from working. Work out a new budget together that allows for the workaholic to bring in less money for the family, while financial obligations are still being met. This will encourage the workaholic to spend more time with the family without feeling guilty about financial burdens not being fulfilled.

On the flip side, be understanding for the times your workaholic spouse has a special assignment that they have no choice in working on at home. Understand each other's feelings and find a balance so that your marriage and family structure does not fall apart.

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_Complacency often sets into a marriage as the years tick away. An exciting and adventurous relationship falls into the depths of a boring marriage. Couples awake one morning realizing they are now married to almost a perfect stranger. Repairing a boring marriage is imperative to keep the spark alive and the marriage healthy.

Joint Hobbies

Select hobbies that both of you can enjoy and do together during free time in the evening or on weekends. For example, the two of you could sew a quilt together. Or perhaps, the two of you would enjoy some friendly competition with a particular computer or video game. To increase energy while spending time together, get involved in sports or even swimming at the YMCA.

Intimacy Jar

Each partner places slips of paper in a special intimacy jar that you keep in the bedroom. Each person writes down one specific activity on the slip of paper. Once weekly (or more often if you choose) a slip of paper is drawn from the jar and the couple does the activity. You can write down anything on the paper because it is only to be shared between the two of you. For example, do a silly dance to made-up music or reveal a secret about yourself that nobody knows. The activities can be more sensual such as a back massage or foot rub. The idea is to bring the two of you together more intimately, whether on an emotional or physical level. Use your imagination when writing down activities, questions or suggestions.

Cook Together

Cooking together is a great way to help stimulate a boring marriage. You can cook together just for the two of you on a date night at home or for the entire family. It is a great way to rebuild the bond between you. Have fun cooking by listening to your favorite music together, telling jokes and just relaxing.

A boring marriage can fall apart without you even realizing it. Share some brand new joint hobbies, create an intimacy jar or cook together to rekindle that spark within your relationship and bring your boring marriage back to life.
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_ You and your spouse agreed that both of you would work a traditional brick-and-mortar job to pay your financial obligations and save for future goals. After a bit of time, you decide that you hate your job and want to quit. You want to start over with a new job.

How do you handle this type of situation?

As a couple, you must decide if it is feasible for you to quit your job and find a new job. The job market is very competitive. Younger applicants are often chosen over experienced middle-aged applicants. Sit down and review your budget. Can you, as a couple, financially afford to quit your current job for a new one?

Look at the financial goals you have as a couple. Will starting over in your middle ages prevent you from reaching those goals? Will you have to use part of your savings during the transition for starting over with a new job? Are you and your spouse willing to postpone meeting some of the financial goals while you job hunt? These are questions that only you can answer as a couple.

It is imperative to relieve financial and marital stress to make the decision together about a new job. You should not just quit your job and inform your spouse that you are no longer working. This will cause resentment and potentially create quite a few arguments.

Sit down with your spouse and decide if the transition is at the right time. Who knows, your spouse might be wishing they could start over with a new job as well. It is important to look at all the different angles and compromise on a solution. Communicating with and talking to your partner will enable you to make the best choice as a couple for you to start over in the job market.

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_If you are 40 or older and married, you may feel your relationship isn't as satisfying as it once was. Marriages go through ebbs and flows. Some marriages are heading for divorce due to a variety of reasons.

One reason marriages become sour is one or both partners feel they are being taken for granted. Once this feeling surfaces, it's hard to get back that loving feeling. But, it isn't impossible. Both partners need to be in tune with each other. Too much resentment and anger can build up over time when couples don't understand the other's behavior or feelings.

You are probably now asking, 'just how do you tune in to your partner'? Observe, pay attention and listen. Listening isn't just about hearing, but understanding what your partner is saying. When your partner says you nag too much, that's a clue to their feelings. It isn't just about an insult toward you, but about how they feel when you nag. If your marriage means something to you, assess what your partner complains about. Are you willing to make changes to make your marriage thrive?

On the flip side, your partner needs to 'listen' to what you are nagging about. Learn to communicate better about how you feel. Most people nag, but really don't say what they feel. Express your feelings so your partner will be in tune with what you are really trying to get across.

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_Positivity is a strong quality to have in a marriage. Giving positive energy and thoughts to each other enables the marriage to sustain itself in the rough times. Overall, life becomes very enjoyable as a couple when there are positive interactions between spouses.

Seek out the positive attributes that originally made you fall in love with your spouse. Praise your spouse on the positive behaviors that you both enjoy and wish to continue in the relationship. You are less likely to dwell on the imperfections and negatives of your spouse if you are actively seeking the positives.

Think about, and decide on, a minimum of two positive things you’d like to do each day for your marriage. For example, you could text your spouse a daily joke or positive word for thought. Don’t expect praise from your partner. Enjoy the satisfaction of knowing you are helping the marriage, not only sustain itself, but to grow stronger.

Show an active interest in your spouse’s hobbies, creative adventures and sports. Show your spouse positive and genuine interest in these activities, even if you do not actively participate.

Make it a rule to never go to sleep angry at one another. Be the first to apologize and make amends, even if you do not always feel it was your fault when the two of you argue. Apologizing doesn't have to be about owning fault, but saying you are sorry if you caused pain to the other. No couple is going to go daily without ever having an argument.

When you seek out the positive and bring more positive things to the table, you increase the positivity in your marriage. This positivity becomes the solid foundation to base the marriage upon and survive through the rough times without emotionally hurting one another.

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Don't Allow Financial Stress to Ruin Your Marriage
Husbands: How to Make Your Wife Happy
Suspicious of Spouse Cheating: What to Do
Dating Again as a Married Couple
Romantic Birthday Gifts for Him
Romantic Birthday Gifts for Her
How to Find Out Your Husband's Secrets
Why Do People Seem to Change After the Marriage Vows
Never Take Relationships for Granted
CPR for Marriage
Tips for Success for Going from Dating to Marriage
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Often, spouses take one another for granted, due to being overwhelmed with daily routines, children, jobs and finances. A husband needs and wants to know his wife still loves and adores him and is the one person that can bring a smile to his face. It doesn't take but a moment to show your husband you care and make him smile.

1. Show enthusiasm in the presence of your husband. Even if you have only a few moments on a busy day to be with him, make sure he knows you cherish those few moments.

2. Don't criticize or nag. Focus on your husband's good qualities. He's not perfect, but neither are you. Look at him with your heart and compliment his good qualities. Remember how you felt when you first fell in love.

3. Listen attentively, even when he talks about things you don't understand or tells jokes that aren't all that funny. If you don't understand what he's talking about such as car parts or the latest football game, ask a few questions. You'll be showing genuine interest and may learn something in the process.

4. Give your husband space. Everyone needs their own personal space at times. This isn't a personal attack toward you. He'll appreciate your patience and understanding.

5. Cook your husband's favorite meal. As they say, "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach". This often holds true and seeing you took the time to cook his favorite meal will certainly make him smile.

6. Be loyal and honest. Never give your husband reason to doubt you or your loyalty. Knowing you are his best friend who he can turn to and are always honest, is one of the best gifts you can give him.

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Following are articles dealing with various aspects of marriage:

Never Take Relationships for Granted

Romantic Birthday Gifts for Her

Romantic Birthday Gifts for Him

Suspicious of Spouse Cheating: What to Do

Husbands: How to Make Your Wife Happy

Don't Allow Financial Stress to Ruin Your Marriage

CPR for Marriage




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